you pick a colour and i sing it for you

 

If you're already cynical about love, don't watch this movie. I was depressed for days. Don't get me wrong, it's an excellent movie but I don't think I can handle the emotion. I know people always wonder how I can love horror movies with all the violence and disturbing visual images, but to me a movie like Blue Valentine scares me more. To me, this movie belongs in the horror genre. It's like one of my greatest fears being realized. How do you go from loving someone so much to feeling disgusted and disappointed by them? It's painful to watch. Heartbreaking.

Some of you guys already know that I can be emotionally retarded sometimes. I can be open about everything else because to me the things I actually talk about don't matter that much. But when it comes to feelings and showing affection, I suck. I don't even cry that much. Funnily enough, I do sometimes cry during a movie, but almost never in front of other people. Usually I just get pissed off when I'm sad (salah emoticon ni.....hoho). In that way, I'm similar to Cindy (Michelle Williams). I kinda hate her; so basically I hate that part of me. But hey, people don't react the same way when they're dealing with emotional issues. The more I'm pushed to the brink, the stronger my silence and resentment. That's why whenever I had a fight with my sister, she'd be the one to reach out to me afterwards, usually within 1 hour. Yup, my silent treatment can be extremely uncomfortable to others (Faux Frenchie: Guiltyyyyyyyyyyy!), but I don't do it on purpose, it's just the way I am. I wanna be more like Dean (Ryan Gosling), openly and bravely confronting his emotion (and Cindy's), but I don't know if I can.

Please don't watch this movie if you're a hopeless romantic. I don't want to be responsible for ruining your day. Or life. Yeah, the movie is THAT good. Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams are officially my favourite  on-screen couple right now. And I don't even like Michelle Williams.

p/s: the scene where he's singing and she's dancing - EPIC.